I don’t want to need you – Original Poetry 2012

So mad at myself for letting you into my heart

Once broken and scarred yet beating

Your love mended it with each soft caress

But now I don’t  know where you begin and I start

You see I loved you so long ago

And though my ego would never let it show

 I was so afraid of needing you that I had to let you go

And I did

But true love never ends and we were destined to meet up again

I couldn’t pretend

I knew you were embedded deep beneath my skin

And though they caressed and kissed me here and there

They could never melt my heart from within

So here I am again and damn

I don’t want to need you

Its decades later and it happened so fast

Coming back into your life when you needed a friend

and once again

I couldn’t resist you

I tried with all my might to push you away but you kept holding me tight

Your arms so strong and warm they made me melt

I started sinking deep into  overwhelming emotions that I’ve never felt

And still I’m trying not to need you

Whenever we kiss I feel an electric shock

that beats your hands to my thigh before I can moan “stop”

So much energy between us

that every touch of your skin next to mine

Sends a chill up and down my spine

And I can’t deny that my body needs you too

Can I trust you, are you true

Do you love me as much as you say you do

Will you leave me, will you stay

Or is it just a game to see how long I’ll stay

Will you

ever

need

me?

The passion doesn’t ever seem to die

And as much as I try and try and try.

Even when you give me a reason why

I should walk away and say goodbye

I can’t seem to bring myself  to leave you

It may not make sense to you

And you may think I’m crazy

I’d rather push you out of my arms now than take the chance

Of one day hearing you call someone else your baby.

My love for you is deep and to the core

My heart still beats faster when I see  you walk through my door

I don’t know what I would do without your love

But I do know for sure

That I don’t want to need you.